My name is Misha. I was born in 1983 in the city Novosibirsk (Siberia). I was living with the mother, brother and sister in one small room of a communal appartment. Mother`s earnings were not sufficient for our family. I grew up as a buttoned up, silent individual and did not reveal any capacities in the kindergarten, did not have friends.

           Finally, at the age of 5 I`ve got to have friends, two brothers from a problematic family of our neighbours. They were regarded as fools by others.

           Together we started to beg and as the time went by we were more and more away from home. We were buying the food, juice, delights on a money that we have earned. Then we were going to a brick-making factory where prisoners were working. We were listening with the dying down in our hearts their conversations about a "beautiful life of adults".

           At the age of 8 I was already selling newspapers and this "bussiness" was successfull for me. Suddennly my talents for this bussiness were revealed. I was observing, thinking and looking for the ways of "marketing". It was found profitable to sell horoscopes in the coffee-houses. Noone did it before and I happened to be the first.

           I have my own group of five friends. They were restless as me. Cigarettes and beer followed delights. Once an acquaintance offered to me to smell a glue "Moment".  We have agreed to do this without any thinking that it is bad.

           We have had our own conceptions on what is good and bad. Bad is when there are no money, when there is cold and hunger. It is bad to let down your friend, to report about him, to be frightened. It is god to trick the world except your own people, pull out more money from the world, to become self-dependent whe you are 9-10 years old. 

          When I was a child my somewhat eccentric aunt, whom I visited from time to time, was telling me about God. But, according her words, God although was real and allmighty but never kind. What he did was a simple punishment of someone and a wrath.

          "Do you see dumb people ?" - was telling me my aunt: - they were speaking bad words and due to it God has taken away their tonques. If a thunder was resounding and a lightning was spakling, for aunt it meant that God is angry with the people that they are so bad. 

          I was shrinking from the fear: "May be He would strike a lightning directly at me ? It is better not to quarell with this God ! He is really strong, stronger of all !".

          We have started to smell the glue. It was great ! I have never had a computer, but here I`ve happened to get in to the computer game, to another world, directly from the basement where we were meeting, to another life, bright, interesting, full of new strange sounds.

           Soon all of us were unmasked. Our clothes were smudged with a glue, there was a terrible odour from a mouth. But nothing has changed, simply everybody now knew that we are toxicomen.

          By that time I was no longer atending the school. In a first class I was an excellent pupil, teachers were saying that I have a faculty for mathematics. The second school year I did not have the time for studies because I was living completely different life, this life was significantly different from the life of my class-mates; my personality was not perceived by others and I was feeling myself in that class as a mature man among the kids. The third year was last for me and my education at that time was finished by it.

            I was small in height and was looking very "young". At the age of 10-12 I was looking as I was 6 year old kid. Soon adult boys - drug addicts have offered to me a new "business" - you need to learn on how to steal, your time has come ! - While you are a small kid noone will think that you have done it, but even if you will be caught - you would be released as a minor.

          I have agreed, it was something new and interesting. Earlier I and boys were stealing toys from the market. But is that a theft ? To get in to someone`s pocket is a real adult affair ! They have started to teach me and very soon I`ve learned that new "handicraft". It turned out well: from simple to complicated things. "Mother", "Father" and a child ( me ) are making shopping and nobody is thinking that this child is a thief.

          I was not at my home for many months, even for one year once. We were staying at different flats, were spending the nights in porches. Afterwards we have found empty carriages of depot as a proper place to stay for our company. There were a lot of money in our possession. I even did not know what to do with them. I was buying clothes for me and for my friends, food, beer, cigarettes and a lot of glue. I did not know another kind of life. We have our own lifestyle, but those others - they are simply duffers destined to be our victims.

                 For a year I`ve never been caught, but later we became more visible for the police. Our troubles have started. Certainly, we were there earlier and more than once. But the reasons for our detentions were insignificant - a glue, begging. But now each time they have locked me to a  one-man cell and were promissing that I would never leave it except the possible confinement in a settlement for prisoners. Then I have started to think about God.

          I was afraid to be in an isolated space. It seemed to me that a lot of water is coming to the room and I am suffocating, choking, perishing. I was supplicatiing: - Lord, save me ! Release me and I`ll never continue those wrong things ! That was my prayer, that was my repentence. They were realy sincere at that moment. I was appealing to God, because there was noone else to turn to, noone was able and wishing to help me. Noone except the Lord.

          I was released and instantly forget everything until the next trouble with the police. How the Lord is patient with such an attitude ? Would I be so patient in His place ? Is the Lord so naive ? 

          I was asking the Lord to release me, but inside myself I was thinking to continue a theft and may be to stop it later on.

          But it did not work out and was never working ! God knew me better than I did. He always knew when I was lying and when I was telling the truth. But very often I myself did not know this ! I did not know what is good and what is bad. Because what was good for me and my friends was bad for others. Duffers and the police say that it is wrong to steal, but who would believe them ? It is wrong to steal a little bit and to be caught on a theft.

          But the Lord has found a tool on how to deal with me and how to explain simple truths to me. 

         I have got in to slavery ! It was a terrible time in my life. I was thinking: - Oh, if the Lord was my friend, then He would protect me; Oh, if any creature from another world would be near supporting me and frightening the enemies.

          More mature boys found that I am stealing in a craftly way and decided to exploit me and put under their complete control. Soon they have a success in it. "And if anything wrong would happen - you would feel sorry that you were ever born !" I have seen a lot and knew that their threats are real. Such heavy relationships were not seen from outside. Iwas afraid to abase myself. May all others think that I am simply having mature serious friends. 

          What I had to do ? May be to kill them at night while they yet did not do to me something terrible ? What I am guilty in and what is going on with me ? And suddenly my conscience started to speak. Or may be the Lord Himself was speaking to me. I have seen myself as if from outside, I`ve seen my real entity, and understood what is realy happening to me, that I have deserved what I`ve had in my life. Lord, save me ! Noone would help me except you !!!

          Something strange has started to happen. We were going to steal, but I was completely unsuccessfull in a theft. I was asked: - "Do you do it on purpose ? Look, you will feel sorry about that !". But the Lord was telling different things inside me: - "What do you want ? Would you like me to save you or to help you in stealing ? Notice, I would not do a second thing".

          I have made the decision. "That`s all !" - I have said to myself and to God, - This time I`ll keep my word. From today, from this moment, I`ll never be a thief. I am choosing the salvation.

          The deliverance has come very soon in a miraculous way. The Lord was real. I have returned to my friends and said to tem that I`ll not steal anything anymore, not even a match of another person. The Lord has done his part of an agreement and I had to do mine. On my returning home I`ve found that my mother became a believer and attends the church "Word of Life", that people there are praying for me.

          What is the coincidence ! But it was not a coincidence, the day of my salvation was approaching me.

          I`ve stopped to smell the glue beside the fact that I was addicted to it during 4 years. I`ve stopped to smoke. I`ve started to feel myself as a victor.

          Once I have entered a shop at the moment when salesmen were not there. All the goods were left without the supervision as if someone was offering to me - "take what you want". My hand was automaticaly stretching to a counter, but I have stopped it. I had the power over my arms, legs, over my life.

          What I am doing here, with my former friends, people who are becoming my enemies ? "Do we have to steal instead of you ?" - they said to me with exasperation. "You become a strange person as you are no longer one of us". But I was still belonging to them, I was on a crossroad and had to make a final decision - here or there.

           I have started to attend the church secretly. Cheerful and joyous people were there. The Lord has forgiven them. There was the love in the church ! It was something real that I was dreaming about since my childhood. I wanted this ! This is what everyone needs ! I, mother, my friends. I have to tell them that I have made the decision, that I am leaving them, that I choose God !

          "Where are you going ? To those duffers, to be like them ? May be you want to become a degraded, a paltry individual, a traitor ?". Who have said it to me - my friends, my fear or satan himself ?

          The time has come. I`ve stand before God and said to Him that there is no way back for me to a previous lifestyle, that I dream to follow Him wherever it is needed, that He can take me if I am worthy, that He can change me, that He can take me out of here to another country, away from those laws, away from this life.

          Such prayer seemed as an insanity for me. Which other country ? We were poverty-stricken people, we were eating kasha made on water without the butter and ate bread rarely.

          I did not even suspect that I am a Jewish. And when people were asking me whether I am Jewish or Gypsy, I was answering them that I am Russian.

          And here is a new miracle, new present from the Lord. Today we are flying to an unusual country of Israel - the private property of Almighty God. He is taking us to Himself, to His pormissed land. The sea behind us has been shut, all the enemies have drown, we have left an Egypt.

          I know that a big and difficult path is ahead of us. But if I believe and very firmly hold to Jesus then He will lead me out of any desert. And with Him all of us will get a victory.

          Keep your word given to God  as He always keeps His word.